Passion Disappear after Kids – why is that?

Once couples marry and have kids, many things change. A big one can be our perception of each other. Because perception easily becomes reality, we need to pay close attention to how we perceive our mate and how they perceive us. For a “wife,” transitioning to “girlfriend” to keep the romance candle burning may seem like work after a day of taking care of the house, the kids, the bills, the yard and lord knows what else.

Because your expressed concern is a dying intimacy, let’s focus on how this scenario could play out differently. It begins with the irony of male/female relationships – how come women have to feel loved to be intimate and men must have intimacy first to feel love?

This little conundrum often drives both genders to dig in their heels and wait for the other one to show some love first. For a woman to germinate the seed of intimacy, it may be as simple as the man helping with something, rubbing your feet or lending a caring ear before launching into his needs, which are fairly predictable.

To nurture a man’s intimacy, try a coy look, a compliment and something other than “I can’t take this anymore.” This will go a long way towards sustaining the thread of interest. Taking off your apron and putting on your teddy will remind him of your feminine side which was likely a big part of the original attraction.

Make the effort to shift your persona at the end of a long day and reignite his passion. Remember, intimacy benefits you both, so this isn’t just about him.